I’ve been rather conscious in the past about not putting people on blast from my blog. It’s rather easy given that many of my topics are about religion and it’s rather easy to call out church names and pastor names. Aside from big timers like a T.D. Jakes or a Creflo Dollar or a Bishop Eddie Long who already have a public persona, and with regards to Jakes’ it’s most certainly crossed over into the non-church domain, I really shy away from talking about people’s individual ministries.
I really want to, but I don’t.
There’s more than enough people out there with blogs solely dedicated to that, and of course any yahoo with a webcam has hooked up to YouTube and dropped a video replete with religious foolishness about why certain pastors are fools for various random and sundry reasons.
But, before I get into my first and hopefully last blast, let me preface this with the topic at hand:
I will say now and forever (at least until I hear the opposing side) that something about the Chris Brown and Rihanna situation does not sit right with me. It never has from the beginning. There’s something about this situation that as a community that we have not dealt with because the face value problem was staring us in the face too boldly. Actually at first, I was waiting until it all played out and didn’t jump on Chris Brown because all of the facts had not been presented to us. I caught some flak for that, but it was cool, nothing serious. But I do believe in waiting to make a statement until charges are filed, which is when I dropped my first post on it. After the trial and what not, I really didn’t have much to say on it, much of the black blogosphere was doing enough talking to not warrant my two cents.
I gave my four lessons that I learned from the incident and two were directed at Chris Brown and men and two were directed at Rihanna and one toward women. Apparently, we’re not supposed to call a woman into question in the case of domestic abuse–I wasn’t aware that we weren’t supposed to question whether or not she was faking (think Lynn Whitfield’s character in “Thin Line Between Love and Hate”), or take this time to talk about domestic abuse in general, not just men versus women, but also violent women committing crimes against their husbands. No, not do a diatribe saying that women are the cause and reason why a man wound up hitting them–not saying that–but, hell, let’s just have an open honest and fair discussion.
But no one wants to talk about the truth, the real truth–because the real truth is often times an inconvenient truth.
It has long been my platform that we must always have a fair debate on an issue. The Socratic method of deconstruction and posing opposing questions to an argument has more than stood the test of time of pushing one on their beliefs and convictions. Plato never resulted to personal barbs when pushed or challenged for a rationale on a subject. Only if a commenter here has started off with personal attacks and has made their comment based more on emotions than on rationale have I pushed back slightly. Generally those people amount to mere trolls who saw a topic and just went off. And especially on other blogs when I comment, I never make a personal attack, particularly since I know there’s no context in text.
So, imagine my chagrin when The Christian Progressive Liberal (CPL) over at Jack and Jill Politics which I’ve had on my blogroll almost from the beginning, came for me today.
I had made the following comment (verbatim):
Well, out of respect for Rihanna he initially didn’t want to tell in detail what happened. But honestly, something about this whole situation doesn’t set right with me. It never did from jump.
I never will condone domestic abuse in whatever manner it is, but I just can’t but be bothered by the commentary that has followed this. I’m having a distinct problem that everyone has so clearly endorsed the gender roles of man vs. woman and woman vs. man. I’m almost insulted because it seems that the male perspective doesn’t have a say-so at the discussion table with this whole Chris Brown and Rihanna incident.
He’s TWENTY years old.
And an immature twenty at that.
I mean, everyone’s responding to him like he’s a fully grown man and been on his own for a while. I mean this is not Lil’ Wayne we got here, but Chris Brown, who’s two steps removed from doing Sesame Street with Elmo. He’s 20 years old, I’m sure his “not remembering” was probably nothing more than him not wanting to go into the sordid details–that I’m sure most people didn’t want to hear in the first place.
Realistically, did we want to hear that any more than we would want to have heard about how OJ allegedly killed Nicole Brown Simpson and Goldman?
And this was more or less in response to the question and the post of the same title: “How Do You Forget Beating Someone’s Ass?” which was a response to Chris Brown’s CNN Larry King interview last week. The following is the exchange between me and CPL:
With all due respect, you become an adult at 18, so yeah, Chris Brown is a fully grown MAN.
Having said that, it still does not excuse him from what he did. PERIOD.
Additionally, since he’s 20 years old, that means he’s grown up during the time period where being sensitive to women was on the front burner. Men who grew up before the 1980s were still TAUGHT that you DO NOT HIT WOMEN, PERIOD.
Brown has no excuse, and if he respected Rihanna, HE WOULD HAVE NEVER, EVER, PUT HIS HANDS ON HER IN THE FIRST PLACE.
If Lil’ Wayne did the same shyt, we’d get on his ass the same way. Read the blog posts about the shyt he pulled at the “tribute” for Michael Jackson and how we railed at that.
You think Sesame Street is going to associate themselves with the likes of Chris Brown after this? They’re going to FORGET they EVEN KNEW HIM.
Please don’t be so “Uppity” that you can’t see what is the reality. [emphasis added]
My following response:
Um, you don’t have to do the personal attacks.
That’s half the reason I don’t comment on here as much as I would like.
Every time I make a dissenting comment I get blasted on a personal level and I’ve never made a personal charge at any other commenter on here before.