Sex is learned…point blank. That is why most people who are sexual deviants experimented with sex at an early age. I was molested as young as five years old however I can say that as young as I can remember I was always attracted to men but was more aware of it after I was molested. It hurts Im 32 now my parents have no idea and if I ever ever told them they would literally drop dead because at some point they would blame themselves for being neglectful parents. Growing up I experimented with both girls and boys because I thought it was normal. It wasnt until I got to middle school that kids started calling me faggot. In school as a kid I remember saying that I am both male and female not realizing now that at a young age I had already labeled myself as bi-sexual.

I love God I love Jesus I love the holy ghost. Ive been baptized I still speak in tongues however I struggle day to day and I exhaustingly ask GOD why. His word does not lie if its an abomination why me? why am I this way? I too feel that I am outside the will of God. I love myself but I despise the sexual appetite and desires that I have towards men…I dont want it and want nothing to do with it. I crave the day that I can wake up one day look at a man and have no desire or feeling for him. I live for the day that I cringe at the thought of being sexually into men. I have to admit, I am still attracted to women I find them to be mysterious intriguing beautiful an quite sexy. I would love to have a family and put this behind me.

Im not trying to come up with excuses but I feel that what also causes this nonsense is the lack of emotional availability from my father. My parents are still married but you can say that my mother is my all shes my life shes taught me what I know so therefore in my search for a prospective wife I seek someone a few years younger than me or close to my age. When I study my involvment with men I realized that they are twice my age.

I want to live in the Lords fullness I want to go to heaven when I leave this earth. I cant’t knock Donnie for his testimony because I can relate to it. We trust so much in the laws of God and what He’s said we desire to change and move forward and not look back….is that so wrong? Its not a matter of being homophobic but its a matter of wanting what God wants for our lives.

Donnie, Rev. DL Foster and others who are professed ex-gays are fooling no one! Black church folks know God doesn’t really change sexual orientation. I know first hand these pastors will hoodwink you and your mama as long as the invites and checks keeps coming.

I told a gay COGIC pastor to simply give it up, if he’s so unhappy. He said, “I can’t – that’s all I know.” I eventually relinquished the relationship because he knew all about church but very little about himself. Today, he remains behind the pulpit – tormented. That’s why Donnie’s message was useless; it caused more harm by pushing gay, lesbian, bi and questioning congregants and officials deeper undercover (DL). They, hide behind the pulpit, first lady, and the word -not hoping God make them new again, but PRAYING not to get caught.

Saints, I know what I’m talking about!!! This ain’t speculation, or pontification – it’s conclusive, creditable, and confirmed. After I began the road of self actualization, I kept singing and taking your money but eventually let it all go. I stopped fooling you and me.

Because I’m self-actualized: have realistic perceptions of myself, others and the world around me ( that same something Bishop Carlton Pearson discovered). I let it ALL go! I’m a Humanist! Yes, I miss all the stage, show, fun and parties, but I’ll gladly hand it over for my total self awareness.

I wish more gay church folk would take the first step toward self-actualization: run NOW from churches that spew anti-gay rhetoric. That’s when life really begins.

I saw the clips of Donnie’s remarks and I still don’t think that there is anything hate-filled about his statements…and I felt that he was trying to give his own story with honesty.

I really do.

He could not tell his OWN story without exposing the other dirt that lurks in the corners of the church… and he knew that.

In sharing HIS story…he was confessing how he used to “pretend” that he was delivered from homosexuality while still seeking out men to be sexually involved with…

He was saying that there are sexual predators in the church construct who are preying on those who are confused about their sexual identity and he refers to them as vampires…

He was presenting these predators as deceivers who want to take the life from someone else to fulfill their own appetites.

I have seen those predators that he speaks of… right in the church.

I see nothing wrong with saying ANY of that.

Donnie was once a part of the homosexual community so I hardly believe the claims of the gay community that he now has a PHOBIA about gays.

The term “homophobia” is supposed to describe a FEAR of gay people, right??? Hmmmm.

It seems that there are gays who want to hurl the term at anyone who doesn’t elevate whatever platform THEY want…

So as a black person, if someone decides that they don’t agree with my views, I should THEN decide it is because they have a PHOBIA about me, about my race, about my gender?? Really?

I don’t think so, Joshua.

Bigotry is apparent when a person assigns negative characteristics to an entire group of people.

I don’t believe that Donnie is practicing bigotry by claiming that he needed to be delivered from homosexuality and he felt that he was outside of the will of God. He isn’t preaching to gay audiences across the country but he is preaching to heterosexual-supremacist congregations.

Does he feel that homosexuality and lesbianism are sins? Yes. Does that make him a bigot? No.

That’s my opinion.

One thing that you and I do agree on, Joshua, about Donnie McClurkin… that he is still working through his own issues.

As we all are.