Good Bye to February

goodbye

This was an interesting month for me.  

It was neatly situated into four compact weeks that were easily to know dates if you remembered your multiples of seven.  There wasn’t a leap year.  This year wasn’t marked by the campaign seasons, beginning back in February 2007 with Obama announcing his candidacy two years ago.  We trotted out the same tired debate asking “Do we still need Black History Month?” and we heard the same tired debates from both sides of the aisle.

Nonetheless this was an active month for me personally.

I learned a little bit about myself, in part because of this blog.

Some bloggers guard their anonymity with the security of Pennsylvania Avenue on Inauguration Day, I’m not quite that strict, but I have been careful about what information I do say.  I’ve dropped context clues so maybe through the power of deduction people can figure out, oh, let’s say where I did my internship last year, but I’ll never tell, lol.  But, I know that the start of this year of school for me has been more than rough, in part because of my two random vacations I took this year already, but partly because I’m really just not feeling this whole church thing.

In addition to that, I got real naked in the post where I compared myself to Kevanhn Thorpe, the 18 year old kid in prison for what amounts to chronic shoplifting of high end name brand clothing, and it yet again reminded me what I could possibly be doing, but instead am constantly climbing into more debt with student loans in a field that probably has the worst job numbers for trying to break into the field.  This field is ALL about who you know and what you can do for them.  The idea of a meritocracy in the field of ministry is the biggest joke going.  So, yeah watching BET’s new staged reality show “Harlem Heights” may prove to be an impossibility.

I also learned this month that I really don’t write these blogs for comments like I used to.  One commenter in particular had suggested that I don’t write for comments, and it took a moment, but then I got it together and just wrote how I felt.  Whether I get comments or not, I still write.  Actually, another friend pointed out to me that most of my posts are more cathartic releases on my behalf–which is true.  In addition to the previously linked post, my “Response to ‘When Does Gay Tolerance Goes Too Far?‘” was also the true epitome of me putting my feelings on “paper” so to speak.

So, for interested parties, let me state that I be, who I be, and for those who enter this space, let me be who I be–and I still got mad love for ya.

Hopefully this month was a blessing to my readers, and yes, I changed the background for those wondering what happened.  I just got tired of the old one.

Keep it uppity and keep it truthfully, JLL

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2 responses to “Good Bye to February

    • @dowl

      I do, always have. It’s just that I’m not writing for the sake of comments. If I did that I’d be basing my existence on how others responded to me.

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